Gone
by Midnight-Shadows39
Summary: New Moon-Instead of the entire family leaving, only Jasper goes. He leaves Alice there, promising to come home to her eventually, but first he has to get better control of himself. How will Alice handle it? Thanks to Shadows.Dance for the plot!
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

**Author's Note: Thanks to the awesome ''-she made up the summary and I adopted it. I hope you enjoy the story! Reviews=love.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own **_**Twilight**_** or any of its characters, nor do I wish that I do. **

**Bella's POV**

I woke up with Edward's cold arms around me, just as always. _Just another normal day,_ I thought as I contentedly stared up at Edward's face.

And then it all came back to me, hitting me in the stomach like a ton of bricks. The disastrous birthday party…the blood…Jasper coming toward me, eyes ablaze and teeth bared…Edward's cry of defiance…and then nothing. It all went black.

"Edward." I mumbled. There was no reply. "Edward?"

He was as silent and still as a statue, blankly staring out of my window with an unreadable expression. I called his name a third time and the sound of my voice seemed to snap him out of the trance. He turned his head slowly towards me and said nothing.

"Edward?" I asked nervously. "What happened?"

It was a while before he replied. Still keeping everything but his lips frozen, he quietly said:

"We were going to leave Forks, Bella."

My stomach lurched. I tried to cry out, but nothing came out.

"No," I mouthed desperately, feeling as if I was going to be sick. A worried expression crossed Edward's face and he hurriedly sat me upright, supporting me with his arms.

"Bella? _Bella!_ Are you all right? Bella! Calm down!"

"No, don't leave!" I tried to scream, but it came out as a whimper. "Don't…leave…You can't."

"Bella." He positioned me so that I was in his lap, but it didn't help. I was near hysteria.

"I said we were _going_ to leave, Bella. I thought we- especially me- are not good for you. We aren't."

He silenced my feeble protests at his words.

"But I know that I-" his voice grew sad and chocked up at this point-I didn't understand. "I can…control myself around you."

"Everyone in your family can," I reminded him. I still didn't understand Edward's sadness, but the next thing he said had his voice ridden with agony-it was unbearable.

"Not everyone. You of all people should know that."

"Oh…" was my intelligent response. I wanted to make him feel better in any way possible, but I didn't know what to say.

"Which is why only one of us left, Bella."

My stomach lurched again, and this time I knew I really was going to be sick. I ran to the bathroom and emptied my stomach as Edward held my hair worriedly.

"Are you all right, Bella?" he asked in a monotone. Now I understood why he was so agonized.

"Tell me it's not true," I whispered, praying that I was having a horrid nightmare.

But I was awake, and this was for real. Edward's face was still grief stricken, and it was my fault.

"No, Bella. It's true. Jasper has decided to leave us."

And once again, everything went black.

**Yes, it's a short chapter. But I needed to get it started off! I hope you liked it, please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

**Author's Note: I'm so sorry for the delay! My aunt passed away and we needed to fly to Boston for the funeral. But I am back and here is another chapter.**

When I woke up for the second time, I was on my bed once again. Edward was sitting motionlessly next to me, and I wondered how long I'd been unconscious. Everything that had happened earlier came back to me in a flash and my stomach twisted a little as I remembered what Edward had told me: Jasper was gone. Another thought came to me and I sat bolt upright, startling Edward out of his trance.

"Are you all right? Bella, what's the matter?"

"Alice!" I cried out, and a pained expression crossed Edward's face. _Alice._ She was alone.

"Does she know?" I asked fearfully. I wasn't sure what answer would be worse-yes or no.

"Yes." Was that good or bad? Nothing was good. All of this was horrific and twisted-my day had started out normal and happy but had gone spiraling into misery with just a few words.

"Take me to her." All of a sudden, I felt a desire to go see her, to comfort her. Without a word, Edward nodded, put on his coat and walked downstairs. I hurriedly got dressed, pulling out the first thing I saw. I pulled my hair into a messy ponytail, grabbed my coat, and ran downstairs. A quick glance at the mirror in the hallway showed that my eyes were large with fear and my face was pallid. I tore myself away and hurried out the door to find Edward waiting in his car. He drove faster than ever and the car ride was tense and silent. When he pulled up to the Cullen's mansion, I opened the car door before he even stopped the car, ran to the front door, and knocked. Carlisle answered the door and I saw that his facial expression was just like Edward's-pained, but somehow expressionless as if he were in denial.

"Hello, Bella." He said in a dutiful monotone.

"Carlisle," I greeted him-I was out of breath. "Can I please see Alice?"

He seemed hesitant. "I don't know if that's the best-"

"Please, Carlisle. I need to see her!" I was almost begging. Edward appeared by my side.

"Let her in. She may be the only one who can reach her." I shot Edward a quizzical look at his words as Carlisle granted me access to their living room.

"Alice has been refusing to talk to anyone." He explained quietly.

"Are you sure you want to go up there?" Carlisle asked. I wasn't so sure myself anymore-I didn't know what to expect, I didn't know what to do. But I had no time for doubts. I gave a quick, nervous nod and ran up the stairs to Alice's room-the one that used to be shared by Jasper. I took a deep breath and offered a tentative knock.

"Alice?" I called out softly. "Alice, its Bella. Can I come in?" There was no reply.

"Alice?" I put my hand on the doorknob and opened the door slowly, only to meet a sight that made my heart plummet. Alice was curled up in the corner of the room, her face hidden by her hands. She was absolutely still and although I know I know she'd heard me enter, she did not look up. I wondered if she'd been sitting there ever since Jasper had left. I walked over to her and crouched down.

"Alice?" I repeated. Her head snapped up and she pulled at empty air and I realized that she'd been hoping against all hopes that I'd brought Jasper with me, that all of this would disappear and everything would fall back in its place. But here I was-alone. Her hand dropped slowly and silently back to her knees and she stared at me blankly. Her eyes were a dark, cold black-so different from the enchanting golden ones of the happy Alice that I knew. I could tell that she hadn't hunted in a while, but there was no bloodlust in her eyes upon seeing me that the normal vampire's would have. Instead, her eyes remained blank and misty as she simply sat there.

"Hey…" I didn't know what to say. My mind was blank and my throat was dry. "Are you okay?" Looking at her, I realized what a stupid thing that had been to say. Of course she wasn't okay! Alice's beautiful face crumpled and her body suddenly shook with vampiric sobs.

"He's gone!" her voice came out as a quiet, shaking whimper.

Helplessly, worthlessly, I rubbed her back as she once again hid her face. "I know, Alice," I whispered to her. "Shh, it's going to be all right."

I stayed with her in that dark room for hours. She never said anything else, she just cried. Edward quietly entered the room and it seemed a lifetime since I'd last seen him.

"Charlie just called," he explained. "He was wondering where you were. We should get you home."

I nodded once and then turned back to Alice. "I have to go now, okay?" There was no reply.

"I'll be back tomorrow," I told her before standing up and walking out of the room. I turned back at the doorway, but she hadn't moved. She had stopped sobbing and was now sitting there motionlessly-just like she'd been when I first came in. Tears dripped down my face and Edward gently pulled me away from the door. I walked like a zombie down the stairs, through the door and into Edward's car. Before long, he pulled into my driveway, got out of the car, crossed to my side and opened the door for me. He pulled my face close to his and kissed me gently.

"I love you," he whispered to me. I gave him a weak smile.

"I love you too." He smiled briefly and told me he'd be back later before going back into his car and driving away. I slowly entered the kitchen, prepared dinner, and ate it with Charlie. He could sense something was wrong, but something in my face told him not to ask. I climbed into bed afterwards, too dazed to do anything else. I was woken later by Edward climbing softly into bed next to me and holding me in his arms before I slipped once again into the soothing blackness of sleep.

Black. Everywhere I went. Black-the color of Alice's miserable, lifeless eyes.

**Please review!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Two**

**Author's Note: Thanks to all who reviewed! **

**Okay, in this chapter, a little bit is going to be in Alice's POV, but it will be when she discovered that Jasper was gone. I'm doing this because I though it would be more effective. After that it goes back to Bella. Enjoy the chapter!**

**Alice's POV (When she just found out Jasper was gone.)**

This was bound to happen. We shouldn't have taken the risk. I love Jasper and I have faith in him 100% but he didn't have complete control yet. And now the inevitable has happened and he lost control at Bella's birthday party-not his fault, really. I knew he felt terrible-he felt like he had disappointed and let down himself, me, and the entire family. I had to go comfort him.

"Jasper?" I called out softly, pushing open the door of our bedroom. "Jazz, it's me."

I had expected to find him on the bed, or maybe on the window seat. But he was nowhere to be seen. All I found was a sheet of paper on the bed. I felt a sinking feeling in my stomach and as I walked toward it, I prayed that this wasn't what I thought it was. I swallowed the lump in my throat and picked up the note.

_Dear Alice,_

_You might think that I don't love you because of what I am doing. But you can't think that of me, Alice, please don't. I have to go away until I learn to control myself-we will have a chance of a better life if I can gain self-control. Believe me, I will come back for you-this is as much for you as it is for me. Tell Bella I'm sorry-I didn't mean to hurt her like that. Tell everyone I'll come back. Please don't come looking for me. I know its hard, but please don't. I love you._

_-Jasper_

I let out a jagged, broken gasp and fell to the floor. This couldn't be real. This couldn't be true. I squeezed my eyes shut, hoping that when I opened them, everything would be all right. But everything was the same-I was alone, still holding that damned piece of paper. How could he leave me? I loved him; I couldn't live without him here! I heard someone come into the room and looked up to see Carlisle standing above me, a concerned look on his face.

"Alice?" he said. "Alice, what's wrong?"

I silently handed him the piece of paper and as he read it, I saw his eyes grow shocked and miserable. Did my eyes look like that? They certainly did not hold the joy and spark that they used to-that came from Jasper. _Jasper._ He's gone. No, he can't be. But he is. Gone.

Carlisle stayed there for a while, whispering things to me that I didn't hear. I couldn't hear anything, see anything, or feel anything. I was empty. I tried again and again for a vision of Jasper, but nothing came to me. Defeated, I slumped against the wall and sank into the darkness.

That went on for a long time.

**Bella's POV**

**Author's Note: The story is back on track now, taking off from the end of Chapter Two.**

I woke up the next morning, finding a note from Edward saying that he had to go hunting. _I love you,_ the last line said. I couldn't help feeling contented and happy as I read that. Edward loved me. He was my forever. I'd been trying to deny it, trying not to admit it to myself, but I was…_glad_ that Jasper had done this. No, I wasn't glad that he had left Alice devastated and alone, but glad that this way, Edward didn't have to leave. Because in a twisted way, I owed it all to Jasper. He'd left so the rest of the family wouldn't have to. I could keep Edward, I could love him. But was I happy? This was unexplainable. I had my love, but could I be happy while my best friend was suffering?

I got up and hurriedly got dressed, pulling on jeans and a sweater-it was cold out today, I noticed. I put my hair in a ponytail and didn't bother with breakfast-I wasn't hungry. Charlie was already at work so I got into my car and headed for the Cullen's house. I fiddled with the radio, trying to keep myself distracted. I couldn't keep the image of Alice's blank eyes out of my head. I leaned back and concentrated on the road as a song came on.

_I hear the ticking of the clock,_

_I'm lying here, the room's pitch dark_

_I wonder where you are tonight,_

_No answer on the telephone_

_And the night goes by so very slow_

_Oh, I hope it don't end, though,_

_Alone_

_Till now,_

_I've always gone by on my own_

_I never really cared until I met you_

_And now it chills me to the bone_

_How do I get you alone?_

_How do I get you alone?_

_Till now,_

_I've always gone by on my own_

_I never really cared until I met you_

_And now it chills me to the bone_

_How do I get you alone?_

_How do I get you alone?_

I shuddered and quickly turned off the radio. Everything now seemed to remind me of Alice's predicament. The flowers that were blooming on trees and bushes along the roadside usually would make me smile, but now they only made me think of how Jasper used to bring Alice flowers, and how that would make _her_ smile. Alice's smile. Her bright, cheerful, beautiful smile that Jasper said could light up a room.

_Stop it, Bella,_ I told myself. _This is much, much harder for her than it is for you. You can't even imagine what it's like for her._

That thought made me even sadder-because it was true. I couldn't imagine what it would be like without Edward. And it was thanks to Jasper that I couldn't. It was thanks to _me_ that Alice's life was hell right now. I mean, really, who else but me would be so stupid, so careless as to cut herself in front of a family of vampires? I tried to ignore my thoughts-they were only making things worse.

I pulled up at the Cullen's house, preparing myself for the sight of my best friend slumped, defeated, in her room. The spark of her eyes gone. I took a deep breath and walked up to the door and knocked. I was as prepared as I would ever be-although I was never _fully_ ready to walk up to Alice, to face her.

What I wasn't prepared for was who answered the door.

**Please Review!**

**The song I used in this chapter is "Alone" by Heart. American Idol contestant Allison Iraheta sang it **_**really**_** well, so if you want please go on YouTube and look up "Alone-Allison Iraheta". I think listening to it would help to understand how it applied to Alice's situation.**

**Thank you!**


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